Day 1: Plane Trip

          For those of you who are interested, I thought I’d give out details about my actual flight. For those of you who are not interested, too bad. By reading this far you have been ensnared in a Maasai eye-lock and will be unable to look at anything else until you finish this post. If you do, you will go blind (please see Legal Terms and Polices).

You’re More Likely To Die In A Car Crash

          Most Airlines and other people that want you to fly will quote this statistic at you: “You’re more likely to die in a car crash than from an airplane crash.” Such people are, of course, perfectly correct.

What I would do for a Root Beer

          To my everlasting dismay and horror, I have discovered that evidently no one outside the US has ever heard of, let alone tasted, the best (and first) soft drink ever created: Root Beer. Since this shocking discovery, I’ve been rather ill, suffering from:

I Love First Class

          I love the way Airlines stratify their business. It is one of the places where the separation of class blatantly exists in America. As it should be. After all, all those in First Class have more money, fancier cars, high paying jobs, more power, and nicer digital watches than the ordinary folks in third class.