I Love First Class

          I love the way Airlines stratify their business. It is one of the places where the separation of class blatantly exists in America. As it should be. After all, all those in First Class have more money, fancier cars, high paying jobs, more power, and nicer digital watches than the ordinary folks in third class.
           Everything is better in First Class:
          •  The Food - You don't just get real food in first class prepared by a master chief, you get to choose what you want to eat from a wide menu of selections.  You even get condiments!  And you thought you were in a airplane and not a restaurant...
          •  Space - If they gave the First Class passengers any more extra room, you'd have enough to open area to play miniature golf.  Actually, that's not a bad idea...
          •  Sleep - Ever tried to sleep in a chair that only reclines three degrees?  Forget that, First Class passengers seats turn into beds!  After all, as a Very Important Person, you deserve to get your shut eye more than anyone else.
          •  View - With the wings well behind you, there is nothing to distract you from the endless vista outside except your laptop and mini entertainment center.
          •  Boarding - "Boarding", hah, forget that!  You my friend are not some cow to be loaded on and off as quickly as possible while the air hostesses milk you dry of every cent you didn't already pay with their snacks and gift trolleys.  No, you, my friend, may "get on" the plane whenever you like.
          •  Safety - Just to show how much the airlines appreciate your business they provide not one, they provide life vests in three locations.  And you just know that they are of a better quality than the ones in Third Class.

          So there you have it, First Class is better in pretty much every way imaginable, and then some.  If you ever go flying, I highly recommend that you go First Class.  You will not regret it.


          I did not fly First Class.


E’ya! - Tate